One of the most wonderful aspects of de-cluttering ourselves is that we make big empty spaces within that Divine Love floods into and fills. Once we have made room for the new within ourselves we can invite the Christ to inhabit us more fully.
What sort of things make up our clutter within? Well we start off light at the beginning of our journey; we are able to live in the present moment, we do not even hold the notions of past, present and future. We are able to simply be, freely, to engage with whatever we are doing, seeing, feeling without placing any projection and even interpretation on it. It is however the brains task to start building our “compartments” of characterisation, in order that when we see, face things in the future…we have something to hinge that on, recognise it with, our memory building begins. So to start with we smell, feel, see, hear, cry, laugh, and we see things in awe and wonder. Everything is new. Light and Love abide in our world, within and without.
A few years down the line, we are a bit more contained. We have experienced the odd wallop and punishments when we have strayed further down paths that have met with disapproval. We know that approval is kind of necessary to our survival now as we have made the links between the provision of home, food and parents. If our needs are to met, we need that approval. We see ourselves as separate to x,y,z. We no longer see ourselves at one with everything. We know what hurt is, we know what feeling good is like. We are grasping notions of what unfair is too…how many of us have not laid in bed as children snivelling about the unfairness of our perceived treatment or lives when young? We have notions of what power over is too…adults are powerful, they control and decide things that we just have to go along with.
Maybe some of us know what being displaced is, what jealousy is by an early stage too; the arrival of a younger sibling means that we are no longer the centre of our parents world. It unsettles us. What if these powerful people whose approval we seek forget us? Forget to meet our needs as they used to? We get the blame now more too…for things that the younger sibling did. More unfairness stacking up in layers. Our starting point becomes more and more distant, its light dimmed.
We start school; where doors of knowledge open and our previous blissful pathways strewn with the wild flowers of discovery close, as received knowledge and conforming become the skills we must now master. We are being moulded into what is acceptable, to society at large, to the workplace, to becoming citizens of our nation. We are perhaps now dealing with rejection and cruelty from peers, inflicted in the ways that only children know how. At the same time, pressure is ramping, pressure to decide our life path, pressure to get good results in exams, pressure to look good, to win the boy/girl, to fit in, to be normal, to be like everyone else, not to stick out like a sore thumb. More closure of our individuality, more layers to hide ourselves behind or more literally bury ourselves under. Life is getting pretty heavy by now but we acclimatize to each new layer of weight; not noticing how heavy the load now is.
Don’t say this, don’t do that, behave like this, act in this way…get the job, work hard, get the boy/girl, get engaged, get married, when is the baby due?…get promotion, pay increases, get the house, do the garden at the weekends, now make sure you attend your children’s needs, your parents needs, your partners needs…disatisfaction creeps in and greets you at the bathroom mirror one day. Be yourself people say. Be yourself? Who is that? Under how many layers are those dreams and hopes smothered now? Can we even remember what they were?
Deconstruction begins. Not that we know how to do it. Life can get pretty messy at this stage. Hapless victims litter the wayside of our trodden paths as we trace our way backwards. We leave casualties in our wake. Fall out of our attempts to re-discover our authenticity can be monumental. Guilt, shame, resentment, anger, inability to forgive all clutter our spaces. But slowly as we throw out the junk in the spare rooms of our minds, decide what to keep and what to throw away, we make a bit of headroom where we catch gasps of fresh air at last. Then we glimpse a little sunshine shining through an exposed window and we sit back in our rubbish piles letting the rays fall on our face, relaxing into that place where we were as children; just being, just enjoying.
Now we are enthused, energised as we see how much space we can make and how much nicer we will be to live in when all the old stinking fetid rubbish is thrown out and the windows are thrown open, letting ourselves flood with fresh energizing air and warm sunshine. When had we forgotten how good that felt? When had we got used to living in our rubbish pile? When had we last seen the crisp clean spaces within ourselves that offered us freedom and Light. Why had we let it get so bad? What were we thinking of!
Approaching one particularly dark corner we see a small huddled heap under ragged blankets, barely breathing. Cautiously lifting a corner of the blanket we see the Christ Child, huddled in foetal position, shivering, neglected, bruised, staring back at us with skeletal face and huge wide open eyes filled with pain and compassion for us. Falling back on our heels our head falls forwards onto our chest as we howl with the repressed pain of years gone by; our failures, our shattered hopes and dreams, for faithless lovers and cruelty imposed on us. We howl for what we too have done, what we have not done and our tears coarse hotly down our face, blinding us, whilst inside us our hardened knots of anguish and anger release their grip and begin to unravel. We weep for prices paid, for hostage and bonds accepted without consideration on our part.
And gently, so gently a tender hand is offered from the blanket and grasps ours, growing stronger in its hold as we let go of all of our pain. Slowly our tears slow and cease and we look up to see the radiance of the strengthened Christ standing before us, dwelling within us, His wonderous eyes filling us with love and power, locked on ours, taking the last of our pain upon himself and transforming it into beams of shining Light. The Light of Love. No words spoken, no need…for we are one.
And we realise with gradual understanding that the Christ has always inhabited our living place, whether full of bright Light or whether the only resting place He could find in our fetid cluttered space was underneath a stinking blanket in a dark corner of our making. Yet even so, He had abided with us, in humbleness and constancy, never to abandon us, never to cease loving us. For He entered this world with us and abided with us no matter the conditions, no matter the price. Once we offered our burdens up, He willingly took them on, transforming them into scars of beauty with Love, before blowing them gently away.
To make clean uncluttered spaces for the Christ to expand out from enables us to shine forth this Light out into the world; to fully engage in the practise of living our faith, of walking the talk, of loving our neighbour as ourselves, of reaching our true potentials, those we were dreamed for, created for; not those which were imposed upon us. We share our Christ Light with all, with no distinction of colour, creed, status, knowing that as we give, so we receive, and in our giving we flood ourselves with receiving abundantly the Light we came to shine forth. The great story of God’s Love for us, is that in residing in us, it is ever waiting for the opportunity for fresh and unique expression.
Let our hearts and minds be cleansed in the power of your love Christ
Through all time.